Two Hearts Unite!

Some of my best (and most embarrassing) memories of my dad involve the song “Great is thy Faithfulness”.  My dad loves music, church, and this song. Whenever this song is played at church, my dad (to this day) will belt out this song at the top of his lungs.  People literally turn around in church to see who is singing so loud.

Another thing you should know: my dad is essentially tone-deaf.

Hence, the embarrassment.

In all honesty though, I have mixed feelings.  One the one hand, sure, it’s embarrassing.  But on the other hand I admire him for enjoying the lyrics & tune so much that all he can do is sing LOUDER.

I love the song “Great is Thy Faithfulness”.  It reminds me that the Lord goes before, beside and ahead of me.  That He is steadfast and unchanging, even if people change (because let’s face it, people are constantly changing).  It helps me remember the hope I have in life.  It gives me hope for our upcoming marriage.

There are a lot of uncertainties going into a marriage.  Will we be financially secure?  Will one of us get sick? Where will we live?  This song reminds me that I do not need to worry over these things.

Great is thy faithfulness, O God my father.  There is no shadow of turning with thee.  Thou changest not, thy compassions they fail not.  As thou hast been thou forever will be.

Great is thy faithfulness.  Great is thy faithfulness. Morning by morning, new mercies I see.  All I have needed, thy hand hath provided.  Great is thy faithfulness, Lord unto me.

Pardon for sin, and a peace that endureth, thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide.  Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow. Blessings all mine with ten thousand aside.

So, first of all, let me just say: I’m sorry, apparently we suck at blogging.  I (Lauren) seem to have a complete inability to remember any password I create.  I am literally CONSTANTLY resetting my password, so the thought of not being able to remember my blogging password and having to reset it overwhelmed me.  Sounds ridiculous, but it’s the truth.

So much has happened I feel like I cannot stop to catch my breath.  My aunt got married, we had Christmas, Peter and I both turned 25 this month, my wedding invitations went out, I had a dress fitting, I picked a cake, picked colours for our home, booked our hunnymoon, and all the shower invitations all went out.  All in the last few weeks (on top of a ridiculous – but fantastic- job).  Looking into the future it just looks like it’s going to be busier (but honestly, I am not complaining).  My older brother is getting married in 9 days, my showers start happening…. etc.  On top of this, Peter’s sister is getting married in June and so is my Maid of Honour, Devon!  Wedding frenzy. 

Life is good.  I feel so blessed.  Peter’s parents and my parents have been wonderful and so supportive.  I cannot thank them enough, especially my mom.  We do so much planning together, we joke sometimes that it feels like I am marrying her and not Peter (haha).  Peter has been very loving and my rock through everything.  All in all, it’s been quite a ride and I’m doing my best to enjoy every moment.  I know it’s going to pass by so quickly.

Goin’ to the chapel… and we’re… gonna get ma-a-a-ried….Goin’ to the chapel… and we’re… gonna get ma-a-a-ried….Gee, I really love you… and we’re… gonna get ma-a-a-ried… Goin’ to the chapel of love!

In SIX months today.  Time goes so quickly.

We are so excited.

Last thursday night, Peter and I went to something called the “Marriage Preparation Course”.  It’s a simple five-week course (once every thursday night) hosted by a local church.  We were told to expect around 12 other couples.  We’d have a “romantic candle lit dinner”, followed by a series of instructional videos that would walk us through various exercises to get us to talk about communication, family, values… etc.  The course, in my opinion, is designed to help couples avoid difficult surprises.

Secretly, deep deep down, I was thinking that Peter and I really don’t need this kind of “relationship education” night. Peter and I really enjoy talking about relationship things [Peter: we both actually do!], and generally have a healthy relationship (in my opinion, for what it’s worth). But we signed up for the course anyway because it came highly recommended.

I’m not going to lie.  We did not learn anything new.

But we had such a fun night together.  Moments where we were practically falling off our chairs because we were laughing so hard.  For example:

- The video is on, and the narrator is running through statistics about how many marriages break up.  She says something like “40% of all marriages break up in the UK”  **** HUGE flash of “40%” runs across the screen**** then says, “That means that ONE out of every THREE relationships break up.”… um…

- The couple on the video took about 5 minutes to talk about active listening skills.   They decided to show a demonstration of how they would listen to each other in an active way.  They reinforced the idea that this was unscripted and unrehearsed.  So the husband started talking about how he doesn’t like when his wife gives him directions when he’s driving.  He says that it makes him feel like he’s inadequate and like she doesn’t trust him.  The FUNNIEST thing though was that the wife was supposed to be showing active, caring listening, but she couldn’t stop laughing when he was talking!  We couldn’t believe it.  You’d think they’d want to retake that part of the video?

- Then, after learning so much about active listening, we were supposed to do an exercise where we each say something that is worrying us.  Peter and I turned to face each other, and he starts by saying “y’know, the other day…” AND THEN I DROPPED A PEN and went to reach for it.  COMPLETELY interrupting him.  We were killing ourselves laughing.

Other funny things happened, such as: we were the only other couple in the room (other than the leaders), we did the exercises in the wrong order (ironic considering the exercises were about good communication), and, before the night even started, we sat in the foyer talking about how good we are at communicating, while we each looked at our iPhones.

Practicing our active listening skills.

What a ridiculous, fun, enjoyable night.  Looking forward to the next four.  :)

I had dinner two nights ago with my wonderful housemates from my university years.  It’s amazing how fast time goes- two of them are now married, one with a beautiful chubby baby boy and the other 30 weeks pregnant with another baby boy.  We graduated two years ago and already so many changes!

3 Darnell on the Couch (2008)

It was a fun night- full of old memories, helpful advice (thanks Court for the wedding video tip!), and general catching up (“Ketchup?  Where?” –Jill)

An interesting topic that came up once or twice was this idea of being a ‘working schmuck’.  We are all under 25 years old, but at least 3 of the 5 of us already feel like we are tired of working for somebody else on (arguably) dysfunctional teams.

I’m not going to lie… I have no idea what to make of this.  On one hand, I feel overwhelmed and kind of sad at the idea of having to work in an office where I am not fulfilled for the rest of my life.  On the other hand, I know that we work- NOT to find our identity- but to have financial means to fulfil our other dreams (i.e. having children, owning a house..etc).  Flip it again, and I find it both exciting and terrifically terrifying to think about opening my own business one day.  But what could I possibly offer the world?  How much risk is involved?  Will that eat up all my time?  Will I make a success of it?  The questions never stop coming…

One phrase continues to come to mind though.

“In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:6)

I look at my beautiful housemates, and where we’ve come in the last 4 years together (has it been 4 years?) and I can see the way that the Lord has taken care of each of them.  I, they, have nothing to fear.

I think sometimes the best answer (for me) is to commit it to the Lord and go to bed.

(And ps- SUZ- if you have that 1 picture you took on Saturday night, send it to me!!)

Just how much I appreciate my future hubby.

For those of you who do not know, I work as a “Marketing Specialist” at a company that manufacturers broadband radios (aka- not the radios you listen to, but the kind of radios that give you internet).  Basically, what this means is that I do a lot of different projects working with a product that uses technology I barely understand.

(To be honest, one of the reasons I even considered taking the job was because Peter both understands the technology and is willing to explain it to me… If he didn’t understand the technology, I think I’d go home crying every day because I wouldn’t have a clue what was going on half the time.  Seriously, this man comes to my rescue a lot.)

So last Wednesday I was given a random task.  Get professional photos of our 4 radios with their various antenna configurations.  Sounds fairly simple, right?  I thought it would be a piece of cake.  Turns out that I completely underestimated the amount of time this task would take.  Here’s a brief run down of my day:

• 8:30 am on Wednesday morning- booked a photographer for 10 am on Thursday morning.  Downtown Toronto.  Done.
• 9 am- start searching for radios that were not scratched. Found them.  No problem.
• 1 pm- Started searching for the antennas.  Turns out that two of the radios both take a 14’’ antenna.  Where is this antenna????  Asked a product manager to help me find it.
• 3 pm- find out this antenna is in Oakville (1 hour away) at a testing lab.  The lab closes at 5 pm.
• 3:15 pm-  I make a mad dash to Oakville.  On the way there, I realize that I have way too much work and too little time, so I call Peter and beg him for his help.  Nice guy that he is, he agrees.  So on the way, I picked him up at his house.  (Another good reason to pick up Peter: I have no sense of direction, and he’s like a walking GPS.)
• 4:20 pm- precious 14’’ antenna is in hand.
• 6:00 pm- Peter and I are back at the office to get these radios ready for the photoshoot.
• 6:15 pm- It occurs to us that there is absolutely no way to mount the 14’’ antenna onto the 2 radios it is meant to go on.  Like, actually impossible.  So I grab our Sr. VP of Operations, he takes a quick look at it, and decides that he has no idea either and says “good luck!” and goes home.
• 6:20 pm-  I guess we’re using duct tape?

14'' antenna duct-taped onto small radio (+ Peter!)

• 6:25 pm- I am cursing the antenna.
• 6:35 pm- Peter and I huddle over the antenna, trying to stick a “vinyl cut” logo onto the smooth surface.  Turns out that a vinyl-cut logo is basically a very badly-behaved sticker that likes to crumple and ruin my life.
• At this point, I’ve lost all track of time…
• Sometime in the evening, I gave Peter a “Heavy Duty Mounting Bracket” to construct.  This thing is a brute.  The best way I can describe it is that it’s like a very intricate Lego set that has to be done in the right order or it won’t go together properly.  The sight of it makes me want to cry.  I’m a good problem solver, but give me something like that to construct and it’s a painfully slow process.  Peter, on the other hand is a great problem solver and extremely mechanical.   So I handed him a cardboard box, with all the pieces of the mounting kit in it, and say to him, “Petes, I love you.  I think you know by now that my physical body- with the mind the Lord gave me- will not be able to figure this out tonight.  You’re my only hope.  Good luck!”  Haha… about 30 minutes later, he turns to me and says, “Lauren, I’m not sure I’m going to be able to figure this out….”  Without even looking at him, I replied, “There’s no other option, loves.  Of everyone in this building, you’re the only one who is capable of doing this.  You can do it!”  … Sometime later, he produced the mounting bracket, completely constructed with both the radio and the antenna attached.  What a champ.

I can't believe he was able to figure this out.

• I then proceed to marvel at his intelligence.
• Sometime after that, we manage to get all the radios into big heavy Pelican cases (basically, huge plastic cases), and into my car.  Of course, these cases actually weigh about 50 pounds each, so Peter ends up lifting them into my trunk.
• We left the office at 11:30.  I couldn’t believe how long preparing the radios took and that Peter stuck with me the whole time.

Then, the next morning, he came down with me in the pouring rain to the photography studio, where he stayed for three and a half hours to help me mount all the radios onto tripods (btw- these radios are incredibly heavy) so the photos could be taken.

I can honestly say that I absolutely could not have done this project without his help (his strength- physically and mentally- and his positive outlook).    I am so grateful to him and for him.  Do you ever feel that way?  Like you’re just overwhelmed by someone’s care and generosity?

This whole wedding process has been one funny experience after another.  Just like wedding dress shopping, I thought meeting with florists & decorators would be all about working with professionals in nice stores with beautiful products.  Turns out, this isn’t always the case.

I have been trying to have a sense of humour about this whole process.  For example, when:

• The decorator held up a ratty old piece of white stained gingham, and suggested we hang this on every other church pew and insisted it would look quite beautiful…
• The florist showed us a “perfect, beautiful example of using gel to hold flowers in a vase”… and it actually looked like something from a Star Wars movie…
• We had to hold the top of the measuring tape while the florist desperately tried to hold together two pieces of a broken vase so she could measure how tall it was…
• When we were handed a catalog of flowers that was literally falling apart…
• We were shown black & white photos of a job the florist did in our venue…. and it wasn’t our venue!

I’m not saying these things are a big deal.   The decorator/florist was exceptionally kind and well-intentioned.  It just makes me wonder though, how do these people stay in business?  When you don’t keep a clean store, your materials are out of date, your website doesn’t work, you don’t invest in taking good photos, your decorating materials are dirty… how do you keep your business running?  I’m not sure.

At the end of the appointment, the florist/decorator sent us home with two roses we are considering for our wedding colours.  Aren’t they pretty?

I have to be honest.  I’m not really a fan of hearing couples speak ‘baby-talk’ to each other.  Nothing about that has ever appealed to me, and Peter and I have steered clear this whole time.

However, last year, Peter introduced me to something wonderful, called lolcats.  If you haven’t heard of them, check them out here: www.icanhascheezeburger.com.   It’s basically cute photos of cats with funny captions using a language called ‘lolspeak’.

Somehow, lolspeak has made it into our relationship!  We’ll now say things like:

• “You’s doing it rite”
• “You gots it”
• “I is so hungries”
• “I am so comfurballs”
• “This is taking forebers”

Here are some of our favourites:

Can you see why we love the lolz?  And, Peter, hunny… I lubs you the mostest.

Peter and I have not been too terribly proactive about this wedding.  People are always asking me, “What have you done?”… and I always sheepishly say, “Not much.”  Actually, let’s be honest.  If you read my last post, you’d know that I’ve spent a LOT of time shopping for my wedding dress with my mom…. haha… so maybe that’s the real reason not much else has been done on the wedding.

Here’s what we have so far:

- The Church (Little Trinity)

- The Venue (Boulevard Club)

- Each other 

Yesterday, though, we went “shopping” for a wedding photographer- aka, we met with one photographer.  There is someone I have had my eye on for a couple years.  His name is Roman Urban.  He takes the most beautiful photos EVER.  And, unlike shopping for my wedding dress (an ongoing process), I do not want to look at any other photographers.  I am SOLD!  Finito!  Yesterday, during our appointment, I was like a fat kid in a candy shop, “oohing” and “aaahing” over everything.  I almost burst into tears watching his slideshow (I had to keep saying to myself- “don’t cry, don’t cry… no one here will understand why you’re crying…”) But it was just so beautiful.

Fortunately, my wonderful fiance remembered all the questions we came in to ask.  Sometimes I wonder where I’d be without him!   Plus, he was also gracious enough to reassure me after the appointment that I was just “very enthusiastic” and not an embarrassment to myself.  What a guy.

Is it too crazy to only look at ONE photographer!?